Monday, May 10, 2010


Everyone wants to have love in their life. But can they honestly say,that they have found it?

I can.. Some years ago December 13, 2006 I met a young man, who forever changed my outlook on love at first sight.

I was a sophomore in college and was dating someone in the military. Did absence make the heart grow fonder? No. It makes one cheat. Which is what he was doing in Hawaii. So I started dating someone in school, but that as not going well at all.

An acquaintance advised that he had the perfect guy for me. I was not happy to hear he was still in high school as I was in college. But, I was advised he was 18 years old; therefore, I gave in. May I also add, I was intrigued by the description of the young man. I decided to meet them at work. At that time, they worked at Baskin and Robbins, which was 3 blocks away from my house.

When we met, there was an instant attraction. He could read my mind and I his. I knew he wanted to kiss me. I told him it was okay to do so. He could not believe I knew what he was thinking, but was happy I gave the approval of his kiss. This was a start of what would be the best relationship I would ever have.

I was very honest with the young man. I did tell him what was going on in my life. I had a boyfriend in the military and one at school. His reply" You will drop them both for me." Cocky? Yes. When I was out on a date with the others, I would be thinking about him. I would sneak away and call him from the pay phone ( at that time there were no cell phones).When I had surgery, it was he who stood by me. Not the others.

He and I had so much fun together. We experienced many firsts together. We went everywhere. I did not feel like I had compensate for who I was. Did I drop both of the guys for him? Yes and I never regretted it.

He and I became a fixture in each other's lives. There was never a time you did not see him without me nor me without him. He was not only my boyfriend, but also my best friend. We talked for hours about nothing and everything. We were so close. Often people mistook us for siblings, as we favored each other.

We were together for almost one year. But he and I were both young. His family was moving to New Orleans and he felt he needed to go with them. I will never forget the day he told me. My heart shattered. I could not catch my breath. My friend and boyfriend would forever be gone. We made many promises to each other that in the end were not kept. Do I regret all that we shared? No.

We parted ways saying that "when you love someone you set them free and if they return it was meant to be".

In the beginning, we exchanged a few letters and calls as throughout the years (1988-1990); however, we lost contact with each other. I often searched for him via online web searches, but never found him. Years later, I saw his name on the website I sent him a message in the hopes of a reply.

At this time, I was going through a painful, bitter divorce. I prayed to God for a man that would respect me and love my daughters as if they were his own. and you know what happened?

I received a response. On April 13, 2006, I was driving to school and my cell phone rang. I answered it and my heart pounded as I heard his voice. I could not believe it. I dropped my cell phone and almost lost control of my car. I gained my composure and we talked the entire night after I got out of school. We have not yet stopped.

After visiting and reestablishing our relationship, I quit my job and moved my daughters to be with my love. We now have two children, Christian and Xavier. Although, there is no such thing as happily ever after, we have come darn near close.

Thank Heaven for Little Girls

When I became pregnant in 1989, I instantly knew I would be having a girl. I was sick morning, noon, and night. I lost more weight than I gained. I was scared and nervous. One usually is the first time they become a mother. It is natural to experience it all.

At this time, I was going through a power struggle. My mother was upset about the pregnancy and my significant other wanted to control my every move. I was extremely depressed. I felt I could not win with anyone. Friends, I thought I had disappeared. I was alone. I would go to work everyday and come home. I never spoke to anyone outside of work. This made my pregnancy even more miserable. When I think of this time, I cry because I had no one to turn to. What should have been a happy time was depressing.

I went to every doctor's appointment alone. I went shopping for my child alone. He was never there in any form. At the time, I was ignorant, which in my eyes was bliss.

He was worthless. During this time, his verbal and emotional abuse escalated. I always felt empowered and strong. He took that way from me. Or should I say I allowed this to happen. But, I had no where to turn. That was until I gave birth.

The day I went into the hospital was April 9, 1990 in labor. The pain was unlike any other that I have felt. All he could say was shut up and stop whining. I got brave and spoke up. I told him until he feels the pain I was feeling he needed to shut the f*%$ up. That did not go well. At about 10:00 a.m., the doctor felt I needed to have a c-section, since my child was not getting enough oxygen.

He knew this was going to happen, but all he could say was.."I am going to get some sleep". When he came back I had already given birth to Vianca Alyssa. I immediately fell in love with her unconditionally, as I knew she would me. Did anyone come and see me? No. I was alone.

Vianca slept with me in the hospital. I did not want her to leave my side. I did not want to be alone. She fulfilled me in ways I choose to no longer do myself. She gave me strength. I started speaking up for myself. The more I did, the worst things became at home. I stopped cooking and started going out.

I went to visit a girlfriend in the Bronx. He called everyone in my telephone book looking for me. When he found me, he ordered me home, like a child. As a child, I returned home. Why? I was scared. I knew he did some "bad" things and what he was capable of. I wanted to be around for Vianca.

But, she still gave me strength. I felt brave. Therefore, I visited another friend several times. I took my telephone book with me. One night, I never came home. When I did finally come home, I was attacked. He wrapped the fingers of each hand around my neck as he pinned me to the bed. I thought I would die. My saving grace, Vianca. Her cries at my screaming saved me. He stopped and left the premises.

That day I finally left and never came back.

Thank heaven for little girls.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

I love a deal!

Anyone that knows me, knows I am a foodie and I love coupons.

Visit the below link and customized it for the city you live in. You can great discounts on restaurants and services. Enjoy.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Houston drivers SUCK!

Since I have been in Houston, Texas (4 years), I have seen too many accidents. Daily Don (ABC 13 News) provides me the traffic updates, all I hear and see are delays on 59, 10, 610, and/or 45, which are ALL the main corridors in Houston. Sucks, huh?What sucks even more is that Don has reported only few of the many accidents that have occurred while on the air. As I drive to work, I encounter many more. And there is no rain or snow on the ground.

Not only are their accidents, but drivers do NOT know how to merge. And let's not start on the rudeness. I have never received so many dirty looks and birds shot at me. Not because I am doing wrong, but doing Right according to the Department of Public Safety. What does that mean? I mean driving the speed limit, utilizing my signals, and of course the dreaded, showing common courtesy to other drivers (letting others merge).

Houston, Texas has drivers that are so RUDE and DISRESPECTFUL.

Last year, I had someone come from an apartment parking lot across three lanes of traffic and rammed our suburban. Airbags deployed. I screamed to my daughter to write down the license plate number (in case the driver did not stop). The other driver who was driving a new Dodge Ram (I know, ironic huh?) advised me he would pull over up ahead and I TRUSTED him. He took off. And guess what I had to do? I followed that fool (OK, more like I chased him down).

He obviously did not realize I was a NUYORICAN and not be toyed with. Well, the other driver must have gotten the message I was not giving up and he finally pulled over after about 20 minutes. Then he got out of the car and immediately said he was not drinking and speaking in Spanish, as well as laughing. What gives? That was the furthest thing from my mind. Man, you do not know I AM NOT THE ONE. I had my children in the car.

He really did not know I am a Boricua. Man I laid into him in Spanish and he dropped his mouth to the floor and and tongue fell out. Then all of a sudden he could speak English. I still lashed into him in my Nuyorican Spanglish. I got every number he could provide from his insurance company, his cell number (yes, I snatched that phone from his vehicle) to his companion's cell (I snatched his too).

Did he apologize? Yes. Did I accept it at that time? No. He was not sincere. He apologized because I caught him.Did I call his insurance company? Yes, as he stood there and I told
everything to them. I included the key point, HE RAN.

Where did he get his driver's license? Cracker Jack box? Which is probably where many Houstonians have received theirs as well.

Houston drivers suck!